Crush

I named him my love only because I was sure
That is what he was
But he was an insane lover
Distant and hid beneath a silk cloth
He always played basketball and then sprained his ankle.
A cycle he was fond of but never avoided.
Balanced me with any and everything he was able to
I fell for him,
Softly at first but then I fell to deep.

Most people called me a fool
I always smiled when I saw him,
And frowned when he wasn’t around
His smile was always enough
It was like my high
Kept me calm and allowed me to bare the
arms of another soon to be forgotten concubine.

The Do Not Enter sign,
Is brighter than usual.
Yet I enter,
No longer afraid of what may never be.
A crush was meant to crush.
I knew he wouldn’t act on it.
Who decides to set themselves up for failure?
Burned by have-nots and
What doesn’t and will never matter.

As soon as I lived a secret,
That has been buried for a semester long
I no longer feel the need to get high
I find myself close to it all.
Forced to view a never ending
Fact that I made the mistake of
Using the fingers I were born with
to tell the secret that I never wanted to escape my lips.

I shall see you from now on
And no longer look down
But up because I was brave enough to
Stand above my fright and
Tell someone what they meant to me.