You’d catch no more than dirt.
With your trap that catches no more than his presence.
Pressure to end your affair,
Surfaces when your conscience makes it aware
That he doesn’t care about what you thought you had.
He’s moved on
And you’re not trying to chase the season.
Base in his lungs as he denies his love for you
And he questions it and you listen.
Breathing your last breathe,
Contemplating how much you need him.
Monday, November 29, 2010
War of Love
I think of a struggle that is forced,
A battle between my head and my heart,
My heart she wants this
And my minds says run he is running too.
I blink and then there are tears.
And I cringe and show my fears.
You you’re going to leave me.
Soon, I will have played the game of pretend,
Telling myself you never existed.
You you’re my greatest fear,
My heart she loves you,
And rather hold this out so the tears can come later
And not in the presence of the glory I wear.
A battle between my head and my heart,
My heart she wants this
And my minds says run he is running too.
I blink and then there are tears.
And I cringe and show my fears.
You you’re going to leave me.
Soon, I will have played the game of pretend,
Telling myself you never existed.
You you’re my greatest fear,
My heart she loves you,
And rather hold this out so the tears can come later
And not in the presence of the glory I wear.
Casonva
The door of the past closed when he passed
By her and pretended not to recognize her:
That’s when I walked into his life,
Brainwashed by the glow of that smile he wears.
Sucks for me, I promised myself a million things
And he has me forgetting.
My eyes are swollen shut,
And have yet to be dilated.
Perfection of the imbalanced persona who seems aloof.
Never minding his smooth accent, and bright smile.
Swindled in with his charm and Casanova like persona.
Cold by the balcony and timid like a child’s first day of school.
Naïve like a fifteen who is knocked off her feet with the love bullshit.
By her and pretended not to recognize her:
That’s when I walked into his life,
Brainwashed by the glow of that smile he wears.
Sucks for me, I promised myself a million things
And he has me forgetting.
My eyes are swollen shut,
And have yet to be dilated.
Perfection of the imbalanced persona who seems aloof.
Never minding his smooth accent, and bright smile.
Swindled in with his charm and Casanova like persona.
Cold by the balcony and timid like a child’s first day of school.
Naïve like a fifteen who is knocked off her feet with the love bullshit.
I think of a struggle that is forced,
A battle between my head and my heart,
My heart she wants this
And my minds says run he is running too.
I blink and then there are tears.
And I cringe and show my fears.
You you’re going to leave me.
Soon, I will have played the game of pretend,
Telling myself you never existed.
You you’re my greatest fear,
My heart she loves you,
And rather hold this out so the tears can come later
And not in the presence of the glory I wear.
A battle between my head and my heart,
My heart she wants this
And my minds says run he is running too.
I blink and then there are tears.
And I cringe and show my fears.
You you’re going to leave me.
Soon, I will have played the game of pretend,
Telling myself you never existed.
You you’re my greatest fear,
My heart she loves you,
And rather hold this out so the tears can come later
And not in the presence of the glory I wear.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Another Goodbye
We aren't talking anymore because when we did it was to vague and I don't trust him.
I can admit. I do have trust issues, if you were in my shoes you would to. But knowing our background and my life you have to understand why I'm so pissed at this situation.
Here goes:
I met him at my current job. We both wanted to work there. I'm like tall, chocolate, and bio major. Things we could do in twenty minutes.
Anyway. I didn't see him for a few weeks then he waved at me on the bus, I'm blind as fuck. I just stared at him. Found out it was him, we chatted for a bit didn't, saw a few weeks later and that was because I worked with him. By then we exchanged numbers, but only text each other for work related situations.
On exactly, October 11, I started liking him. And I found out he liked me the 18. We began talking on the 19. Clearly it's a month later and we're not talking. I blamed myself until we talked it out. Text it out for whatever reason. And the reason why is because I made jokes about his ex. A lot of jokes about his ex.
On November 10, we stopped talking. How you demanding trust in a month, if it was 5 months, a year. We can discuss it, I don't even know if what we're doing and you're asking me for trust.
Yeah, so now you're up to date with my lack of a love life.
And the joke was the following, don't judge me.
Q: What's yellow and smells ?
A: sulfur.
I know, I know. I'm cheesy.
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
I can admit. I do have trust issues, if you were in my shoes you would to. But knowing our background and my life you have to understand why I'm so pissed at this situation.
Here goes:
I met him at my current job. We both wanted to work there. I'm like tall, chocolate, and bio major. Things we could do in twenty minutes.
Anyway. I didn't see him for a few weeks then he waved at me on the bus, I'm blind as fuck. I just stared at him. Found out it was him, we chatted for a bit didn't, saw a few weeks later and that was because I worked with him. By then we exchanged numbers, but only text each other for work related situations.
On exactly, October 11, I started liking him. And I found out he liked me the 18. We began talking on the 19. Clearly it's a month later and we're not talking. I blamed myself until we talked it out. Text it out for whatever reason. And the reason why is because I made jokes about his ex. A lot of jokes about his ex.
On November 10, we stopped talking. How you demanding trust in a month, if it was 5 months, a year. We can discuss it, I don't even know if what we're doing and you're asking me for trust.
Yeah, so now you're up to date with my lack of a love life.
And the joke was the following, don't judge me.
Q: What's yellow and smells ?
A: sulfur.
I know, I know. I'm cheesy.
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Another Forgotten Kiss
Decipher clear memories
Wishing they were cold and unsure
Balancing now with then.
I know we just kissed,
I just don't remember when.
The last time ours were whispering
was the last time they'd touch each other.
My mistake thinking I could fly
By jumping off the roof.
Sure enough, I figured I'd cling onto you.
It didn't happen that way.
I kissed you, I remember.
You kissed me back and you melted my heart.
Insides all warm from the start.
But I began to fall and you watched it all.
You became so tall and unclear.
I risked it all,
Just so I could see
That feeling, and I didn't fly.
Just another last kiss.
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
Wishing they were cold and unsure
Balancing now with then.
I know we just kissed,
I just don't remember when.
The last time ours were whispering
was the last time they'd touch each other.
My mistake thinking I could fly
By jumping off the roof.
Sure enough, I figured I'd cling onto you.
It didn't happen that way.
I kissed you, I remember.
You kissed me back and you melted my heart.
Insides all warm from the start.
But I began to fall and you watched it all.
You became so tall and unclear.
I risked it all,
Just so I could see
That feeling, and I didn't fly.
Just another last kiss.
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
Monday, November 1, 2010
Now and Forever
Minus forever
A few pointless tears and unheard of feelings.
You didn't keep your promise.
It's frustrating what I remember.
What you swore to uphold and I needed to hear your secluded words.
At that sure moment,
I trusted and your presence was enough to make me quiver in.
Even minus the now
A few teardrops, and lies
me begging you to stop.
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
A few pointless tears and unheard of feelings.
You didn't keep your promise.
It's frustrating what I remember.
What you swore to uphold and I needed to hear your secluded words.
At that sure moment,
I trusted and your presence was enough to make me quiver in.
Even minus the now
A few teardrops, and lies
me begging you to stop.
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
Heart breaker
You remind me of a no good
Heart breaker,
On a prowl,
Breaking my frail heart
Leaving one to many scars.
Even as we kiss and those lips of yours
Are so sweet even when they're not with mine
I long for them, and I whisper
Patterned nonsense.
That I echo but can't grasp.
Handling his frail conscience in the palm
Of my non existence hands
Griping the undying words
He utters and
I shutter and deal with the weird feelings
Scaring my insides.
Still he is the same insane heart breaker,
Silently making me another victim.
And those soft lips and needy words
The right words in the right way
Won me over and I collapse when he returns
Silencing the doubt I'll always have.
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
Heart breaker,
On a prowl,
Breaking my frail heart
Leaving one to many scars.
Even as we kiss and those lips of yours
Are so sweet even when they're not with mine
I long for them, and I whisper
Patterned nonsense.
That I echo but can't grasp.
Handling his frail conscience in the palm
Of my non existence hands
Griping the undying words
He utters and
I shutter and deal with the weird feelings
Scaring my insides.
Still he is the same insane heart breaker,
Silently making me another victim.
And those soft lips and needy words
The right words in the right way
Won me over and I collapse when he returns
Silencing the doubt I'll always have.
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
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