Truthfully

We were in love. We loved each other really hard. It was epic. Three years later, a million kisses, love letters, poems and joyful tears, we ended. It turned to a million miles away. He left for the U.S. Navy and I couldn’t deal. I didn’t know how. I missed him so much. There were always either weeks or months when we didn’t speak due to missions, etc. I missed him. I didn’t do it on purpose but I basically threw it away. I cheated. I confessed. He dumped me. We got back together a few minutes later. But we weren’t the same. He said he couldn’t tell me he loved me anymore. In the end we aren’t friends anymore.
I went to sleep with a damp pillow, and that is if I felt like dreaming. I barely went to class because I would be knocked out because I wasn’t getting the proper sleep. Sadly enough my grades suffered. I didn’t get to experience my fall semester like someone dorming would want to. I simply reacted like a crack head whose dealer refused to supply her with crack. As soon as I thought I didn’t need him, I walked away from him. I relapsed. I called him after I promised him he would never hear from me again. I ruined our friendship and just didn’t understand why we couldn’t be together anymore.
I would change it all though. I regret opening up my heart. I wasn’t ready. All of the pain I suffered with him leaving for the Navy and the decision I made to cheat could have been avoided. My mother said we were too young. We should have listened. I would never have to wipe tears off of a man’s face. He wouldn’t have to miss me. I wouldn’t miss him. We wouldn’t still be in love. I feel like this because we were in a long distance teenage love relationship. I don’t think this was a healthy decision for us.